[jinzo64]

bang bang i shot you down bang bang you hit the ground bang bang that lovley sound bang bang i totaly shot you down

[animemental1]

That's a lie!

[Kira2521]

The cake is a lie! (hang up)

[animemental1]

Don't eat the cake. Or else you will lose the game.

[jinzo64]

very mini skirts caused the wall street crash you women

[SquintyMccheese]

where do ya want the body?

[zanemalindeal]

Dump the body in the river and don't tell...

[Kuni Linguist]

Hello? hang on a sec... Mom more tounge on the balls, less teeth on the ****... anyways, hello?

[zanemalindeal]

If this isn't an incredibly beautiful woman i'm hanging up.

[Shuiia]

I'm telling ya the coke will be ready next friday nigga >:O

[Kuni Linguist]

childrens soup hotline, you bring em, we cook em

[Shuiia]

Ya'll need to hide yo kiedz, hide yo wife and hide yo husband cuz dey rapin' anybody out here

[Kuni Linguist]

can you call me back? im trying to tie up the neighbors child again

[Darkerviper]

hot babe hotline you pick them we screw them

[zanemalindeal]

Good bye Mr. X

[Shuiia]

How did you get this number? o.O I'm in a witness protection program you **** O_O

[Kuni Linguist]

jesus? is that you?

[Shuiia]

Tightening my noose could you hang on a moment?

[Kuni Linguist]

this better be good, i was about to eat my cat

[Zuiichi]

Hello please leave a message after the beep. If you leave a message after the beep be sure to include your name in the massage. After the beep please wait at least 3 seconds before fully recting your message. Be sure to leave your number after the beep so that i can call you back at a later time if i do not answer at any time during this message and wish to call you back.............beep...*click* (out of time)

[XxFabiGBxX]

hi! did you remember what you promise me this night at the motel sophie??

-im her mom...

[jinzo64]

hello no gives a fap about you or your fap

[Mr. Closter]

Have you checked the children?

New here, sup everybody.

[jinzo64]

are you new if so press 1

[Mr. Closter]

Intruder alert! Red spy in the base!

[Kuni Linguist]

Intruder alert! Red spy in the base!

why you so cranky? who pooed on your dad?

[zanemalindeal]

Kill the reds Kill the Reds Kill the Reds

[Kuni Linguist]

there are too many fish heads in the bathroom with you!

[zanemalindeal]

I swear she looked 18

[Kuni Linguist]

condom? whats a condom?

[zanemalindeal]

And then she showed me the scar.

[Kuni Linguist]

Im not going to talk to you... YOU ARNT REAL QUIT CALLING ME!

[zanemalindeal]

Hello? You've reached the international terrorist removal agency. How may i direct your call?

[Kuni Linguist]

the game the game the game the game the game... hello? stil there? the game the game the game!

[zanemalindeal]

you just pressed 7

[Kuni Linguist]

grandma im cumming!!!!..... *deep breaths* hello?

[zanemalindeal]

Dance punk dance

[Kuni Linguist]

make this quick, im trying to put a fleshlight into my tickle me elmo

[zanemalindeal]

Call 911 the zipper's stuck!!!

[Kuni Linguist]

tasty dead baby hotline, you shake em we bake em

[zanemalindeal]

My name is Micheal J. Caboose and I EAT BABIES

[Kuni Linguist]

hi, welcome to Real Actors Providing Education, or R.A.P.E. how old is your child and when can Ben Affleck teach them?

[jinzo64]

lol

i'm in your bed with your grandpa

[Shuiia]

Sorry, could you call back? I'm dying at the moment...

[Kuni Linguist]

you every take a really great poo? like i mean fantastic. ugh, i just did. so realaxing. anyways who is this?

[jinzo64]

stop phoning me on the land line you weirdo

[Kuni Linguist]

ninjas hijacked my mother!

[animemental1]

God called.

[Kuni Linguist]

my penis feels like an olive in a martini.

[XxFabiGBxX]

did u buy condoms??

[Kuni Linguist]

this better be the call saying your dropping off the money or the girl is dead!

[jinzo64]

i'm dead and soon you will be to.

[Kuni Linguist]

whooooo iiiissss thiiiissss!!!! DO YOU WANNA PLAY A GAME?

[jinzo64]

you reached a help desk your not going anywhere for the next 6 hours.

[thebigred71]

Make this fast your mother's on the other line.

[jinzo64]

hello lady's uncle roshie here how about a feel

[Kuni Linguist]

my skin is bleeding oranges, i need my cookies quick!

[jinzo64]

please hold the line not so tightly.

[Kuni Linguist]

hey.... hello? HELLLOOOOO?!?!? guh i think i got a prank call.... just kidding whats up?

[jinzo64]

you are one of my slaves

[Kuni Linguist]

if this is jeff again I swear we did it 1 time! it was camp when we were 12... IM NOT GAY!

[jinzo64]

this is mat i'm busy so go die loser

[Kuni Linguist]

is there any way you can call me back, i have explosive diarea and am running a marathon on my cell

[jinzo64]

can if have my left ball back?

[Kuni Linguist]

mom is that you? give me my pants back!

[jinzo64]

i can't die superman

[Kuni Linguist]

welcome to the justin beiber fan hotline, please hold while we play his music for you

[jinzo64]

did you call ghostbusters your retard ghosts arn't real

[Darkerviper]

of course i killed your sister

[Chaos+]

"Turn in and walk into that room so we can talk."
"Who the fu*k are you?"

[Tayson1570]

"Hello Sex Shop here what size did you say you wanted again sir ^^?"

[Darkerviper]

hello suicide hotline today we have a buy one got one free on all guns

[animemental1]

**** you, I'm busy.

[jinzo64]

i plan to kill santa

[Barty64]

hello... yeah phone me when im not doing ya mam

[jinzo64]

you fail

[Barty64]

Put that down!!!

[jinzo64]

i'm stalking you

[synbad2]

sorry. wrong number *Hangs up phone*

[jinzo64]

no,no,no,no yes

[Barty64]

Were did you get this number douchbag

[animemental1]

I did it all for you...the money...the sex...the pain...it was all for you...

[Barty64]

*In a childs voice* Mummy theres someone on the phone asking me what i'm wearing

[XelaisPWN]

No, this is NOT an answering machine.

[animemental1]

Suck my dick, bitch!

[Barty64]

Please leave a message after the beep asshole BBBBBBBBBBBBBEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

[Chewi105]

City morgue!

[thedarkmessenger]

*In a childs voice* Mummy theres someone on the phone asking me what i'm wearing

LOL xD

[jimmyjam9014]

you have called the voluntary suicidal hotline, we will come to your house shortly

[jinzo64]

i'm writing your name in my deathnote

[Shuiia]

the line is being traced...in a few seconds we will know more about you biologically, mentally and ideologically than you know about yourself...

[jinzo64]

i'm going to steal your soul

[Darkerviper]

*in a child's voice* are you my mummy

[mattroks101]

I'm gonna pull the trigger kid I really am and, oh uhh I'm busy at the moment and STAND THE f**K STILL BITCH!! DON'T MAKE ME HAVE TO SHOOT YOU!!! uh anyway please call back another time.

[jinzo64]

i'm the voice in the back of your head

[Guthix]

youve called the rejecyion line,you can start crying in 3...2...1...

[Kira2521]

We buy any car dot com!

[Shuiia]

Dodson private eyes: we be climbin' in yo windows snatchin' yo people on film

[jinzo64]

rape with a rake

[Barty64]

Get out Daimion

[Darkerviper]

surprise sex line we'll give you surprise sex anywhere, anyway, anytime.

[Kira2521]

Pop Quiz, how long does it take to beat a moron to death?

[l33tcman]

yes we still have your kids

[Luhood]

Either

"STOP CALLING ME YOU ****ING PSYCHO!!!"

"I did it all for you! The tears, the sex... it was all for you!"

Or just start to sing Caramelldansen! :3

[Kaiju]

7 Days...

[jinzo64]

you say goodbye and i say hello

[talkanor]

this is al qaeda wait there is someone at the door :)

[MADEVIL]

Thank you for calling, please open your mouth so I my insert my balls

[Shibbidah]

(In a desperate voice) "Oh thank god. I was debating between whether or not to do it, so I said to myself, "If someone calls me in the next 5 minutes, I'll do it." (Gunshot)

[bloodlover1987]

bat credit card

[Darkerviper]

power rangers hotline how can i help you

[humnut]

Hello, thanks for calling the National Sodomy Hotline. To confess about an anal rape, press 1. To report an anal rape, press 2. To report that you are currently being anally raped, press 3. . . You pressed 3, we are sorry to inform you that all our lines are currently unavailable, please call back at later convenience. Thank you for calling the National Sodomy Hotline, and good luck.

[Darkerviper]

sony betrayal hotline how can i help you.

[Kira2521]

You are the weakest link, goodbye

[NodMan]

Nothing, I answer the phone however I want. If I see it is a 1-800 number I answer in funny or obscene voices. Asking them questions and wanting to sell them things. I answered the phone once doing Yoda, trying to sell the guy on the other end my used Jedi underwear.

[Darkerviper]

oh my god i just wet myself

[jinzo64]

jump,jump now it's your only option

[Darkerviper]

come down to mcdonalds and get free waffles

[mattroks101]

You look so pretty

[Darkerviper]

can you bend over please mmmmmm no panties

[MADEVIL]

Your mom has a mouth full right now, can she call you later?

[Darkerviper]

your mam can't cum to the phone right now as she's about to have the biggest orgasm of her life.

[talkanor]

i like flying hippos and i would kill you for a klondike bar

[Chillpalazzo]

I'll take a potato chip... AND EAT IT *heavy breathing*

[MADEVIL]

Can you help me I have a Barbie doll stuck in my ass

[Darkerviper]

Help paris hilton trying to have sex with me

[jinzo64]

ring ring ring ring

[ThePsychoGamer]

Not now, I'm going insane

[talkanor]

chocolate rain some stay dry and others feel the rain(i think)

[MADEVIL]

Thank you for calling, prepare for the insertion of corn

[jinzo64]

i'm still behind you

[MADEVIL]

Do you like your balls shaved or hairy?

[Darkerviper]

can't talk right now i'm having sex with your mam:p:D

[MADEVIL]

How may I rape you today?

[Darkerviper]

it's raping time

[MADEVIL]

Have you watched amv hell?

[jinzo64]

for gods sake i said hang up

[BleachBebopAlchemist]

All YO YENS ! YIP YIP YAP!

[Treez0]

plz wait while you name is being written down on the death note pad

[talkanor]

ding dong the witch is dead

[jinzo64]

follow the yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road of a cliff.

[synbad2]

Burn baby Burn flames are getting higher

[mattroks101]

Don't look behind you. My pet does not like to be stared at.

[jinzo64]

hi i'm your granma

[BleachBebopAlchemist]

GO GET BENT YOU SICK FU- Oh hi Mom.

[thedarkmessenger]

Don't look behind you. My pet does not like to be stared at.

XD

[Gentle Dementia]

"Slutbucket"
It's not that it shouldn't be used per se, it's just so hard to work it in tastefully.

[jinzo64]

can interst you in being the new corn queen

[flamingbambi]

YOU LOVE IT YOU SLAAAAAAGS! *hangs up*

[Darkerviper]

come on little doggie

[synbad2]

Eeeekkkk! He touched my breasts!

[MADEVIL]

Can I poop on your chest?

[Darkerviper]

i can see you but can you see me *looking through window*

[MADEVIL]

Congratulations, your the next person I rape and kill, oh just to let you know I might make a sandwich out of you too

[Darkerviper]

mmmmm breast sandwiches

[MADEVIL]

Tag your it (then hang up)

[Vazain]

"There is no god--only ZUUL!!!"

[Darkerviper]

who you gonna call

[MADEVIL]

this osama bin laden how may i help you

[jinzo64]

i'm here in your head

[Darkerviper]

get out of my head *hitting head against wall*

[Sir Fluffykins]

*chk-chuck* "This is a robbery"

[Darkerviper]

OH a smith & wesson rifle

[mattroks101]

Walruses are my favorite flavor of ice-cream.

[Shuiia]

Hey you should come to the Boston Marathon today I got us some KILLER seats at the finish line.

[ThatsNotMyName_studio]

"Good Afternoon, Tinnitus Hotline - 'Where the phone is always ringing'."

[mattroks101]

Nigga I benchpress bitches like you! Fight me irl!

[sotaros]

sotaros' morgue, you stab 'em, we slab 'em

sotaros' crematorium, bar and grill, how can we help you?

sotaros' funeral services, you plug 'em, we plant 'em

[Darkerviper]

boom headshot motherf****r

[jinzo64]

what ever you do, do not look behind you.

[DXM]

Helga's House of pain and pancakes....How can you service me, scum?

[urahara1001]

Goldstein's Circumcisions - Can I interest you in our half off special today?

[Lunaris_Starchilde]

I told you yesterday. I told you they day before. I don't have it. I don't have the money.

[SquintyMccheese]

Ok. . . that's nice. . . now, touch a little lower. . . hehehe

[urahara1001]

Hello. Before you ask, I do not have Battletoads.

[jinzo64]

,Hello,Hey Listen,Hey listen,Hey listen,Watch out!!!!!!!